Hard Lessons

I had a hard lesson this week that I'd like to share with all of you out there. Over the last few months I met a woman through a small group in my church.  She's a amazing, beautiful, sweet, kind.   Honestly, she changed my perspective on a lot of things.  Initally I wasn't that attracted …

Discipline in Dating

There's a guy named Jocko Willink, Navy Seal, businessman, author.  Jocko writes books about leadership and success and discipline.   Recently I listened to a podcast with him and he was discussing ideas about discipline from his book Discipline Equals Freedom. That concept really struck a chord with me.   Here is what Jocko says about discipline …

When You Think She’s Perfect

Crushes.  Unrequited love.  Call it what you want, but sometimes there's that one person that you just can't get out of your head. Now sometimes, when we crush, it's really all in our head.  Sometimes that person just doesn't feel the same way, there's no real connection.   I seem to have this a lot lately, …

Lessons From Taking a Chance

I learned something recently.  I learned that my crush didn't want to go out with me.  I learned some lessons from this process and I thought I would share. Stop Being Ashamed of Attraction I realized something.   I'm ashamed of attraction.  I've been working hard to get to the core of this, where my shame …

Accepting Yourself

This, like most things I write here, is very personal. For me anyway, and maybe a lot of you, there is a lot of shame in the idea of desire.  Specifically sexual desire.   I've been told, since I was young, that I shouldn't be attracted to certain people.  Some of this probably came from rejection …

Mutual Crushes are Hard

I've been thinking a lot lately about romance.  About the fear that comes with romantic relationships.   Most of the problems in dating come down to fear.  And what creates the most fear?  When both you and the person you are interested in are afraid.  When you are both crushing on each other.  I want to …

Not Good Enough

I'm going to be real here.   My number one problem, and I think many people are like this, is that I inherently believe I'm not good enough.  I think, I feel, I know that if someone got to know me they would reject me because I'm simply not enough.  Blame this on lack of confidence, …

Things We Can’t Change

But denunciatory rhetoric is so much easier and cheaper than good works, and proves a popular temptation. Yet is it far better to light the candle than to curse the darkness. - William L. Watkinson I read a tragic story this morning.  A 9 year old boy came out as gay to his mom.  While she was …

She Wants Your Time

How many songs have been written about women who left because they were being ignored?  The guy was working too much, cheating, distracted, whatever. Bruno Mars says it perfectly https://youtu.be/ekzHIouo8Q4 I should have bought you flowers And held your hand Should have gave you all my hours When I had the chance Take you to …

Fear and Isolation

I've realized something in my life recently.   I'm afraid.  I am where I am in life because of fear.   I self-sabotage my life just to feel safe. I've been aware of this for a while in certain areas, but I couldn't quite figure out why I was this way.   It didn't make sense to me …